Review: Bachelor Canada returns with tears and twists

He’s muscular. He’s got three-day stubble. He looks pensively off into the distance while pausing during a walk on the beach. And he’s looking for love. Canada, meet Tim Warmels. Thus encapsulated the first 20 seconds of Thursday’s two-hour Season 2 return of City’s romantic reality series.

Before nary a limousine door had opened viewers were told things were going to be different. “Four girls, not two, will be going home,” he announced in a teaser clip. Audible gasps from the girls he was speaking to. Yup, Tim is dead serious about finding the girl of his dreams. And, after a quickie introduction where we learned Tim was a Bay St. trader turned tech company owner turned builder, our hero  jetted to Vancouver to start his journey. But not until he’d showered, pulled pants up over his boxer briefs and buttoned a crisp white shirt over his naked midriff.

Of course, there were 25 ladies battling for a few precious seconds of Tim’s time. Among them a 42-year-old lingerie model, a philosophy student whose philosophy outside of the classroom is to party, an ER nurse, a real estate agent with a troubled past, a burlesque dancer who waxes crotches, and an annoying blonde who boasts she’s a “joyologist.” Whatever that is.

At the mansion, the most notable of the ladies who spilled out of the limos and into Tim’s arms were Rileigh the philosophy student who presented Tim with a tray of shots (perhaps forgetting the mansion was stocked with libations); Sachelle, who gave Tim a seashell to remember her by (because the name Sachelle wasn’t unique enough?); Ritiuska, who was shocked Tim could converse with her in Spanish (of course Tim knows Spanish, he’s the Bachelor!); Sarah, who made Tim swear under his breath as she walked towards him and was playing the “mysterious” card; Natalie the French teacher who may very well be the crazy gal of the season; and April the burlesque dancer/wax artist who exited the limo in a spray of confetti. She’ll be sticking around for a few weeks just for laughs.

Kaylynn, a slow-talking ballerina, connected with Tim over their childhoods (they were both bullied) and he admitted to producers that he wanted to kiss her, as did Rileigh, who Tim confessed had hoped she would grab him for a few minutes. Most awkward exchange of the night went to Christine the music teacher who decided to sing to Tim. You could cut the uncomfortableness with the knife Kelsey used to open a bottle of bubbly. So imagine my surprise when Christine was given the First Impression rose from Tim and instantly made her the target for derision from the remaining girls.

Tim wasn’t done there, though. Tossing around roses like host Tyler Harcott had bushels of them backstage, Tim gave flowers to Natalie and Sachelle, which sent Kaylynn into a spiral of self-doubt and excess mucous. In the end Tim showed the door to 10 ladies, the most notable of who was Jennifer the joyologist, who struck me as a really good friend rather than a girlfriend and, sadly, Raelee, who Bachelor Canada fans voted into the competition.

An extended teaser for the coming season shows Tim entertaining the ladies in Italy and idyllic isles, the return of one competitor and Lisa being labelled the villain of the show.

The Bachelor Canada airs Thursdays at 8 p.m. ET on City.

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